A Birth Mom’s Journey

By Stephanie Blok
February 22, 2019

You would think that I would have something more to report on the DNA kit. Some things just take more time than we would like. The first kit would not activate; the second kit did activate but it took weeks for it to get to the lab.

The real concern is that I got scared. It’s one thing to face fears in our day to day lives, but the idea of meeting a child that could easily reject me is beyond frightening! It took me weeks to even open the box on the DNA kit. When the second one came, I activated it right away, but then it took me weeks, again, to do the swabs and mail it.

Working in this field, I sometimes get reminders that it could be ok too. When answering a call, it was an adoptee’s child asking about search techniques. Somehow, I always manage to be on phone duty when this type of call comes in. The adoptee was born 13 years before my daughter was born! It could still happen for me that I am eventually reunited.

(A few months later)

The key to DNA results is to look in the biggest pool. The free kit that I was given did finally come in. It was very interesting in the results, mostly that they are very tight-knit. As it turns out, my ancestors could (and probably were) Vikings. Since that is one of my favorite times to read about, I thought the results were very cool.

As for the DNA results helping me search for my daughter, they didn’t. As in, not at all. The closest match was a 3rd cousin.

What I have chosen to do about it is this; I’m not going to worry about it. I will continue to share my story where it is helpful. I will continue to work my cases to help the families on both sides and especially the children. I’m happy to report that the adoptions that I see give the children the potential for a great life!

The follow up that I’ve had with the birth families has also been positive. That part of the job is the most pleasant surprise of all.

To read other installments in her story click on the links below:

http://www.heartofadoptions.com/blog/searching-her-daughter-modern-ways

http://www.heartofadoptions.com/blog/adoption-other-side